Power, love, and a sound mind

Have you ever experienced this? Even as I was trying to put together my thoughts on the topic, I felt like it was happening. Spiritual warfare is not something many people talk about, and I'm not trying to sound super spiritual, but there is a reality that we cannot see. It is powerful. It is discouraging. BUT, we do not have to be captive by it because God has promised to be with us through it all.

I wrote several of the items which have been on my mind recently which have been sources of discouragement, with full intentions of writing the encouraging items next. As I was writing, however, my heart started to grow weary, I wondered whether this would speak to anyone or if they would think I was crazy. So I switched tasks and started to study my French. And then get on Facebook and check my email. I just wanted to get away.. from my discouragement, from the spirit of fear which pervaded. But as I checked my email, I realized that a song by Shane and Shane was playing in the background of my mind: "Be near, oh God, be near, oh God of us. Your nearness is to us our good." Gently, my God was encouraging me to continue, I believe. And even as I was telling Ryan that I couldn't blog about spiritual warfare because I felt attacked, WHAM, the verse in 2 Timothy 1:7 came to the forefront of my thoughts.

For God did not give us a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love and of a sound mind.

And I knew I could go on. I should. And I would finish my blog. So here goes.

Some items of discouragement:
There has been another death in the family. Dr. Martin Salia, a wonderful surgeon, served his people in Sierra Leone and lost his fight with Ebola last week. Why would the Lord take him home when there are only 6, now 5 surgeons, helping to treat and serve the entire country?

We heard that one of the only ways to get free education in Congo is by joining a local mosque. Our friends who were in Kinshasa during the time when this system went into effect said that the percentage of people who considered themselves Muslim soared. I support free education, but if one must convert in order to obtain that free education, I find it heartbreaking. Heartbreaking because it puts such a difficult decision on parents, heartbreaking because I wish there were more options, heartbreaking because it feels so forced. How would a mother and father feel if their children could not get educated based on religion and their poverty? New City Fellowship, a multiracial Christian church in St. Louis, supports several schools in Kinshasa that help feed and educate students who come from impoverished families. I wish we could do more.

During a discussion, it came up that ISIS is currently making around $1 million a day in oil sales. And blatantly and boldly killing people. (I have avoided the news surrounding them because it just causes fear and sadness within myself).

A very nice young couple here at our language school, pregnant with their third child (under 3) sit next to me in class. They recently lost their grandfather, who not only was beloved, but also their biggest supporter. That, along with the news that several of their donors stopped giving to them has created a deficit in their monthly support. Now, they have until December 1 (one week) to raise $15,000 in one-time support. Otherwise they will have to quit school, fly back to the US, and then have their baby and try to raise support again to come back.

Ryan had a setback this week in that he felt like he was nearly healed from a muscle injury (hyper-extension) in his leg and on his first day back, felt it pull again. This is particularly hard when sports are such an outlet for him (have been most of his life) during times of hard study. And it is a great time for him to be immersed in French as all of his teammates, the refs, and the opposing teams speak solely in French.

Sometimes it feels like the Enemy is winning. There are times when we feel we are at the frontlines.

Some items of encouragement:
Last week I spent the morning in a personal spiritual retreat, listening to worship music in French by Paul Baloche. We also went to an English! time of singing worship songs to God. This really was uplifting to my spirit.

We attended the baptism of a sweet older French lady in our church here. The place was packed and standing-room-only. What a great celebration of a new life in Christ!

We have had several people write personal emails or Facebook messages over the past couple of weeks which have been very timely. One of our home churches is sending us a Christmas care package :)

It has been such a blessing to be around the other students who have done and are going to do some pretty cool things in the world. One couple has lived in Brasil for 25 years and are learning their 3rd language. They have quite a bit of wisdom to share. One gal lived in Niger for 8 yrs and will now be living in Paris. Some are families with 4 or 5 children and we can watch how they teach their children to live without normal comforts, go to an all-French school. Several children are very talented in musical instruments. Soon, we will be going to Cameroon, North Africa, Togo, Congo, Niger, Chad, and places in France. I guess the main feeling I get when I am around people with such varied dreams and experiences is that I am a part of something bigger than myself. And that gives me great encouragement to feel a part of that. Even as I dig into the nitty-gritty of the French language, that vision of us going out from this school and making a difference in the world in the name of Jesus gives me great hope.

So there, I finished it. My ups and downs are sometimes just a normal part of living, but sometimes the intensity of the discouragement or the promptness or improbable-ness of the feelings (such as feeling hope in the midst of terrible circumstances) helps me to know that this may be spiritual warfare. Let me end with this quote:

"What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?... Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who then is the one who condemns? No one.... Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble of hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? ... No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate use from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." - Paul in his letter to the Romans

Feeling like Home

As we drove into Albertville, as I was doing my 5th load of vacation laundry, and as I restocked my pantry with essential groceries via bike, I realized that this really feels like home. 

Ever since we turned our lives upside down when we put our house on the market in April, life has felt a bit unsettled and chaotic. Thankfully, miraculously, we only had to show the house once (with a small baby and a dog and being in residency at the time). We had tons of friends around us to help and the blessing of an entire basement to live in with a God-given friend. But it still seemed chaotic. In June, I graduated, took my written board exam. For the next two months, we didn't have a place of our own. We spent a good chunk of the summer traveling and visiting family and friends and the other chunk moving everything from our married life thus far from our sold house and into storage, a shipment container, Goodwill, or suitcases in the basement of our temporary home. Then we moved half-way around the world to a country with a strange language and small bathtubs (Tim likes to say that it is like a second toilet bowl, but I love how little water it takes to fill it up to get a good soak!). We were consumed with learning how to live in the new environment, finding what routine to use, and then we jumped into French acquisition. Each day off, on top of homework, I felt like I either needed figure out how to cook something new or meet new friends or find a new bike route, and it. just. felt. hectic. Soon it was time for a visit from my parents (woo hoo!) and Sydney's birthday and vacation. Vacation? I hadn't even had time to think about it. I'm even tired from writing this too-long, full-of-run-on-sentences paragraph.

We took time to reconnect, process, and enjoy our family on vacation. It was so needed. And now, looking back, I can feel such a difference. We got away, went to yet another country with different money and languages. Doing so, however, made me appreciate that I really am starting to understand French. I'm starting to appreciate a lot of the cultural differences. And it feels like home. At least for the next 7 months. 

Switzerland: Hiking and the Brothers

Our last, but certainly not least favorite, place to visit was Switzerland. We left our wonderful AirBnB hosts in Germany and headed to Switzerland. We took a slightly different route so that we could drive through part of the small country of Liechtenstein. Also on our route, we stopped at Lucerne, Switzerland, where Ryan took us on a short tour of the downtown area with long wooden pedestrian bridges over the river. It was the location he remembered best from his senior trip in high school. Sydney loved watching the swans.

Our last resting spot was not another AirBnB; rather, it was a guesthouse run by the Christusraeger Brotherhood, our ministry partners who also work in Vanga! The purpose of the guesthouse is to provide a place for retreats, family holidays, and also for the many pilgrims who walk through that part of Switzerland. As they say, "The beautiful surroundings encourage the soul to unwind and become open to the message of the Gospel." We certainly found that statement to be true for us! The proceeds of the guesthouse support their work in Afghanistan and also Vanga, Congo. They provide hospice for patients who are dying, a fund for the poor who cannot pay for care, and general upkeep of the hospital. If you want to know more details, their website is in German, but they have an English pdf which I'll link you to here. http://www.christustraeger-bruderschaft.org

When we arrived late Sunday evening, they greeted us warmly and served us a hot dinner! Brother Thomas, who worked in Vanga for 3 years, is in charge of the guesthouse. He ate with us, and then took us to a small cottage where we would sleep for the next 4 nights. He personally made sure that we had enough blankets and brought us an old wooden crib for Sydney. For the entire time we spent at Ralligen, we were completely taken care of. We had 3 hot meals a day except when we were out for the day, and they even provided us with food to make our own sack lunches! It was truly a relaxing experience and highly recommended for anyone traveling to/through Switzerland.

There are many buildings on the property owned by the Brothers, but the largest is Schloss Ralligen which is translated as "castle" but which really just looks like a very very large house. It dates back to the 14th century when it was the Augustinian Monastery of Interlaken. There is a full kitchen and dining room in the first floor, a tea room, meeting rooms, family room, conference room on the second floor, and then taking the large spiral staircase, there are 2 more floors of rooms and a sizable chapel at the point of the roof. Several times a day, the Brothers will say prayers and sing in the chapel and all the guests are invited.

Most of Monday we spent in personal reflection, prayer, solitude, or exploring the property. However, in the afternoon for a couple of hours, Tim, Nancy, and I drove about 10 minutes to a village nearby to see a very high and long pedestrian suspension bridge. In Switzerland, the mountains are incredibly steep, but then have places that are flat partway up and on these tiny spaces, there are villages. It is like the village is on a shelf. The valleys between these villages plunge down and then back up, and in this particular village, the bridge cuts the walking time to the next village (on the "shelf") from ~30 min to 5 min. We admired the bridge, then took the 30 min plunging path through the valley just for fun. I now consider that my favorite 30 minute hike! There was a waterfall at the bottom, and a small bridge. I took a video, being sarcastic that we had traveled far to see this small bridge, when I actually saw how awesome it really was.

In other words, I was really put in my place. We climbed the other side of the valley and then crossed back to the village via the pedestrian bridge. Every movement was felt as the bridge was quite light and suspended by cables. Tim got white knuckled at first, but enjoyed it. It probably didn't help that Nancy and I were lightly bouncing as we walked to see how much the bridge could move. ;)

We spent our next two days hiking the magnificent Alps. The first day, we took a funicular (basically a train that gets pulled by a cable very steeply up a mountain) and then cable cars (like a ski lift) to get to the summit, and then we hiked for about 4 hours on the top of the mountains. 

The funicular, complete with a tunnel and a turn!

Like walking on top of the world!

That evening, Brother Thomas made a special presentation about Vanga to a German church group which was having a retreat that week at Ralligen. Someone graciously translated for the Rices and us so that we could understand. Seeing Vanga through Brother Thomas's eyes and learning lessons through his experiences was a highlight of our time there. "This is not a success story, but a love story," he said towards the end, reflecting on the many times when things didn't go as planned, when people did not appreciate something because of a clash of culture, or when miscommunication happened. But, in all of that, he wanted to share his life with the people of Congo and love them as Jesus did. What wisdom! What honesty! "This is not a success story, but a love story." What an asset to have the opportunity to learn from him! At the end, the Rices and we spoke for about 10 minutes about our journey to medical missions and specifically to Vanga. Brother Thomas closed the meeting by describing a meeting held recently about the future of Vanga and their current needs.

"We need a surgeon." 

"We need more teachers."

"We need people who want to work with the youth."

"We need people who love Jesus and love our people." 

Dramatic pause... and he said to the German audience, "If you have been praying for us and for our work in Vanga,.." Then he paused and looked at each one of us: Tim (teacher of medicine, lover of Jesus), Kathy (teacher of nursing, lover of Jesus), Ryan (teacher of research and engineering, soccer coach for the youth, and lover of Jesus) and me (surgeon, teacher of medicine, lover of Jesus). And he continued, "These two families are an answer to your prayers." Goosebumps. 

Our final day of hiking was our favorite day of the vacation for all of us. We had very sunny skies even though it was cold. Brother Thomas came along with us, sneakily paying for our tickets to ride the aerial tramway. We drove through a valley with the mountains rising as steep cliffs on either side with waterfalls frequently pouring hundreds of feet over the edge of the cliff. One of the cities in the valley only gets 3-4 hrs of direct sun during the summer and 30 min in the winter! We then rode the aerial tram/cable car with about 75 other people and it whisked us up the side of the cliff and plopped us on top where there was a tiny village called Gimmelwald (featured on Rick Steves' Europe). We took the next car up to Murren and then walked on the Kid's Adventure Trail, complete with playgrounds along the way and a small zipline in the trees (which all of us rode, including Sydney with me). We had lunch in a sunny spot on the patio of a closed ski restaurant, talking extensively with Brother Thomas throughout the hiking and especially at lunch. We continued our afternoon on the Northface Trail which, indeed, warranted clothing made by the company of the same name. (Brrr..) We concluded by walking through cow pastures and trees and back down to Gimmelwald. The beautiful scenery combined with beautiful weather, a easy to medium hike, and wonderful conversation with Brother Thomas made it the highlight of our vacation! 

Lunch break with Brother Thomas

Rest/snack break for all

Brother Thomas expounding on his experiences organizing a soccer tournament

Northface Trail

Sydney loves those hiking sticks!

Tim capturing the moment

Dachau Concentration Camp

 "Work will make you free." It is the slogan written in iron at the gate to Dachau, the first concentration camp of the Nazi regime. It was enormous, much larger than I had suspected, with only 1/6 of the camp devoted to prisoners and the rest for SS officers, a plantation, sport field (for SS), and places of work. Dachau was made just 2 months after Hitler took over for political opponents, but then became the model camp for all of the other hundreds and hundreds of camps started throughout Europe. Although I have read my fair share of Holocaust and WW2 books and watched a few movies, I still learned a lot from our tour. Prisoners were shuffled from camp to camp based on whether they could work or not. A lot of the medical experimenting happened in Dachau, and most of it was not even helpful research. We all would agree that medical experimenting on prisoners is evil, but there wasn't even a good goal in mind for most of the subjects. The numbers- they just numb me just as the numbers killed in any war or genocide might. It is the individual stories told that really move us, and that is what many of the books and movies give us- a glimpse into the horror that was. The memorial is iron cast in the shape of people on barbed wire, and the inscription, written in multiple languages says, "never again."

Model of the whole camp. The straight rows of barracks on the right with the rectangle around it was the part where the prisoners were kept.

 One of the barracks in the foreground with rows of foundations for barracks (~60) beyond.

 Inside the barracks.

The museum was in the "maintenance building" so we took the path that the prisoners did as they walked through the gates and were registered, etc. given medical exams, and then sorted and told where they would be. How tragic.

The prison within the prison

Only one person escaped in 12 years. A view of the electric perimeter fence with "no man's zone"

Then a ditch and barbed wire before the electric fence

Crematorium ovens

Gas chamber (rarely used)

This memorial gives me chills. How I hope this statement is true.

Salzburg and the Sound of Music

We spent the day in Salzburg, Austria, a smallish city of about 150,000 which is home to most of the set of the Sound of Music, Mozart, and some very old parts of town. When I say "very old," an example is that the Nonnberg Abbey featured in the Sound of Music was founded in the 700s! Ryan, Nancy, and I decided to take the official original (sometimes obnoxious) Sound of Music tour while Tim and Kathy walked with Sydney around the old town. Our tour was 4 hours long, narrated by cheesy jokes, interesting facts, and a lot of coverage of the country. It was definitely worth it. We traveled up the mountain to the wedding chapel which was used for the film for their wedding. It was gorgeous, but our favorite thing was eating warm apple strudel with ice cream in the little cafe just across the street from the Basilica. 

Sydney made a friend from Afghanistan. At the Mirabell Gardens (one place where they sang "Do-Re-Mi")

A pedestrian bridge they ran across singing "Do-Re-Mi"

Leopoldskron Palace (where they filmed the backyard, lake, and gazebo scenes)

Ahh, the gazebo. Please refer to some of the fun facts about the gazebo. :)

The red roof is the Abbey

Riding up into the mountain/lake region just above Salzburg

Selfie on the tour bus

Peter, our cheesy, but very good, tour guide

The Mondsee "Wedding"- Basilica

A view of the inside- or you could just watch the movie again

Crisp (warm) apple strudel 

The delicious strudel came from this cute cafe

Interesting Tidbits

• Did you know that Gretel, the little girl, almost drown on the second take of the scene where they fall into the lake? She was supposed to keep a hold of Maria's hand but they fell out on opposite sides of the boat that time. 
• They would have shot all the scenes of the inside of the house except they could not get permission to bring their camera equipment into the old palaces for fear that they would damage something. So they had artists come from Hollywood who then were able to recreate the rooms on the Hollywood set. 
• The gazebo was given as a gift from Fox to the conference center (former palace) where the lake and outside balcony scenes were shot. Despite their initial excitement for the gazebo, it was a huge downside to have tourists climbing over the wall and disrupting their meetings with dancing across the benches in the gazebo. They moved it to a local park for easier access, and then eventually had to close the gazebo because an 80 year old woman broke her hip trying to jump from bench to bench. 
• The front of that same palace by the lake was not used for the house because there were too many trees to see how big it was. So they filmed the outside of a different palace for those shots and this palace is not even close to the lake. 
• The mountain which they filmed Maria climbing and the family escaping was about 10 km away from the town of Salzburg. Our guide said she was a true athlete to be able to get back to the Abbey in 3 minutes. 
• The mountain leads, not to Switzerland and safety, but rather to Germany and danger. In reality, the family put on hiking clothes and went on a walk down a familiar path but only 5 minutes to the train station.
• The family really did win the music contest shown in the film. They were given many business cards at the contest from people from all around Europe. These Europeans let the Trapps know that they would be interested in hosting performances if the family was ever in their area. The Trapp's Uncle Max was a stanch Nazi, but he loved their family and helped them to escape. Captain Von Trapp then used those business cards after they escaped to earn enough money to get passage to the United States. In the US, they continued to tour to get enough money to live. They eventually settled in Vermont. 

If you find any differences in what I've just described and Wikipedia, I'd go with Wiki. :) I am just recollecting what our guide told us. He had a way of saying things tongue in cheek. We always joked that we watched the Sound of Music every Christmas at Grandpa and Grandma's house. In reality, we probably just talked about it every year. It really was a masterpiece of a movie with some pretty enduring and endearing songs. 

Castles of Bavaria

The Castles of Bavaria*

Green pastures of Bavaria with church in foreground
 and the "Cinderella" castle on the mountain

Vacation has begun. After a couple of months of intense language study, we needed a respite. We dropped my parents off at Geneva after a wonderful visit. Then we traveled through 4 countries and into a different season (summer became fall, then winter!) France to Switzerland to Austria and finally to southern Germany in a large area called Bavaria. They call it "The Texas of Germany" because it is so vast. Ryan certainly liked the comparison. As we were driving, Ryan commented that he felt like we were going past a lot of golf courses. The grass was so green against the blue sky, and it was short from the grazing of sheep and cattle.

We reached our first AirBnB location and were greeted warmly by a lovely German couple into the upstairs apartment of their home. (AirBnB is an internet-based reference of places to stay locally and in homes and empty rooms of people instead of in hotels.) We walked to the local grocery store (very tiny) to stock up on our food for our time here. 

 As I was paying for my groceries, Kathy, Nancy, and Sydney were outside. An older woman with a flag, looking like a crossing guard, marched up the street with her herd of cows! An older man strode behind the herd with a stick. They were saying something to Kathy and Nancy with urgency, and it was then that they realized that the cows needed to come through a narrow alley right where they were standing on the side of the grocery store. I guess when it is milking time, they come right to the store!

During the two days we spent in Bavaria, we went to 2 castles and a palace, all made by King Ludwig 2. Since pictures are worth a thousand words, I'll let you take a tour with brief snippets.

 In the winter, the area is very popular for Nordic cross-country skiing. Who wouldn't want to ski in a valley with those views of the castles? We parked our cars in the free parking lot and walked the skiing trails to get to the castles. 

Getting closer! Long walk.

The front courtyard

Main entrance (on the side) with impressive gate

Inside the main entrance looking at the castle

In the courtyard looking back at the main entrance

A view of the "photo op" bridge from the castle. Look above the waterfall for the bridge.

On the trail up to the bridge

Family photo from the bridge

Looking down from the "photo op" bridge at part of the waterfall below

And the sun peeked out for a bit!

The Neuschwanstein Castle (the "Cinderella" castle) seemed to be built just for the sheer beauty of the location and the building exactly for enjoying its magnificence

From the bridge, a view of the next castle (nestled in the trees on the left- orange)

We walked 8 miles this day to see the two castles. Best free day ever! Only inside tours cost money. If this were in the US, I think someone would block off the road and make us pay to go up further. At least they would make us pay to to across the gorgeous bridge where photo ops are without question, the best!



\

Looking back at "Cinderella" castle when God put in His glorious display

On the second day, we went to Ludwig's palace. It was a jewel box. Tiny in comparison with the grand castles of the day before, but packed with gold, silver, porcelain, mirrors, vases. My favorite room was the room of mirrors which made it seem as if we were in an endless room. His bedroom was the biggest of the palace, with a canopy bed about 20 feet high and a view of a cascading waterfall and gazebo straight out of the window of this bedroom. My other favorite feature was the dining area where a table was raised and lowered from below so that he could simply sit and enjoy company until the table, all set with food and cutlery, raised up in front of him. Too bad we could not take any pictures inside. 

Outside, it was snowing, which made for a chilly sightseeing day but also very pretty as the green gardens had a fresh layer of snow on top.

In the evenings, we have played games, watched a movie, blogged, emailed, planned our solar power initiatives in Congo, planned some home improvements for our new home in Congo, and drank a lot of hot chocolate. It has been refreshing.

*A note to our generous supporters. 
It is hard for us to know what to think about how we should handle vacation time. What should we post? Shouldn't we be transparent? To be clear, we don't use any donated funds, but there is still some guilt associated with posting photos of vacation. I vacillate between thinking:

Many of our supporters have and are sacrificing a lot to help keep us here and to help us go to Congo to serve the people. What will they think if they find out or if I post about adventures and things they would love to do or dream of doing but cannot afford to do so. How would that make me feel?

and

Jesus spent time away from the people following him to refuel with His Father. We are trying to be wise with our time and money. We have only eaten out once in over 2 months, and it was while my parents were here. We are in a very cheap rental car, staying in other people's homes. And these castles are not too far from France where we are studying. Shouldn't we spend time relaxing sometimes so that we don't burn out and have to stop our mission work because of fatigue?

We believe that money is a gift from God, a tool to be used. So whether we are living based on donations or whether God has given us the ability to work and a job in which to work, we should strive to be generous in giving to those in need, take time to invest in our family during periods of respite, and pay off debts and invest wisely. So, I hope that you as the reader/supporter/family member will understand that even as we write about some amazing things we are getting to see and do, we don't take the blessing for granted, we are so grateful for these opportunities, and we recognize the sacrifices that have been made. We want to thank you.